It doesnt get easier... it just gets different.

The title is talking about parenting. When your kids are really little - babies - it seems so much of your existence is spent keeping them alive, fed, clean, happy, etc. When your nursing your glued to your couch most the day. When you have a fussy baby who wont calm down you look forward to the day when they are older and wont be crying like this. The list goes on and on. Your constantly waiting for something to get easier, something to change. And some things do. But overall the difficult things just shift to different difficult things. Hence the title, it doesnt get easier, it just gets different.

Cameron is in a stage where things are getting "different." He is much easier in so many ways, I mean, he can still be a handful, but he listens much better usually and is starting to do chores and be more helpful around the house. But in so many ways its getting trickier. He is at a stage where he has lots of questions, sometimes hard ones to answer. Sometimes ones that break my heart. He has become very curious and confused by death and what happens after. So he often has questions about that. I often laugh after talking to him because he says the funniest things while trying to process. He also is at a stage where he is getting ready to go to school. With that, and all the sad and terrible things we see these days, he has to understand what to do in case of any kind of terrible situation that could happen. Like what to do if someone comes in shooting (yea, terrible I have to prepare him for that....) or if someone tries to take him or do anything inappropriate with him. Its all so overwhelming. So he sometimes has questions about that. I always tell him "if someone is trying to hurt you, just run away, run fast and until you find someone to help you." My heart hurts thinking of all the things we have to prepare our kids for these days. Things I dont think our parents would have even fathomed. Back when the Sandy Hook thing happened he saw me crying and asked why. I of course was being super lovey and huggy at that time and I just told him I was said because someone had hurt some little kids and it made me cry. I realized immediatly I shouldnt have said anything, but at the same time I wanted him to know that if someone ever comes in at school shooting what he should do. But what should he do? I heard a study that showed that people who ran in mass shootings instead of hiding were more likely to live. I tell him to run. I dont know. Just thinking and typing it all breaks my heart. Why do I have to talk to my sweet little 5 year old about things like this?! Tonight he asked me about it again and hasnt brought it up for a while. I reminded him that every time we pray to Heavenly Father we ask him to keep up safe and to watch over us. And that if we do that he will keep us safe. Thats the best thing we can do is have faith. I reminded him that Heavenly Father and Mommy and Daddy will keep him safe if he listens to us and follows what we tell him.

Basically what Im getting at is that he is coming into a whole new level of understanding. And its a whole new kind of parenting. Difficult questions with difficult answers. Parenting is such a tricky job. Im sure it just gets trickier and trickier the older the kids get. Trying to find a balance between telling them just enough for their sake of understanding but not over telling to frighten or scare them or even just to have too much info too young. I want my kids to understand that there are dangers in the world and how to avoid them if they can. But how do you do that without scaring them. The joys of parenting, right? Unfortunatly we all make mistakes in parenting. Our parents did too Im sure. But all we can do is rely on the Lord to guide us and rely on what we feel is best for our kids, not what others tell us is right. We as parents have been giving inspiration as to what is best for our families and children and I think its important that we remember that in all our decisions. WE know best. Not our neighbors, friends, random ladies in the grocery store (lol) or even family sometimes. So thats my plan to try to get through all these quesitons and shifting of parenting style I guess you could say as we transition into a new kind of parenting with him. My plan is to listen to what I feel is best and to listen to what I feel the Lord would want me to do.